Oh, Dr O! **hugs**

You can get through this, I'm positive. Do what you need to to get yourself back on track, we'll be here when you get back! Hope to see you commenting/lurking over at FTTT :)

Dear Dr O. I am glad you're taking care of this now. And serious props to your hubby for making that happen. *hugs* and I hope you feel better really soon.

I'm so sorry you are feeling this way.  I completely understand what you are going thru.  If you ever need a sympathetic ear please don't hesitate to email me.

You aren't a bad mom, you aren't abnormal and you aren't alone.  ((hugs)) You are smart and brave and ahead of the curve by reaching out for a little support.

You can get thru this.. there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm so sorry to hear that things aren't going well. Post partum time sucks, and I found the ~6-8 weeks PP to be the start of some REALLY hard times. I think the pressure to try to somehow mesh your roles as a mother and a scientisit (or whatever profession a mother is) is just so incredibly dificult. we're somehow expected to be able to do it all and act like we never had a kid while at work, and be the best mom in the world at home and somehow keep all our shit together when hormones keep fucking with our heads and bodies. I'm glad you're getting help and I am glad your husband is helping you get help too. things really started to settly for me when my kiddo was ~4 months and by 6 months I almost felt like a normal person (except my hair was falling out thanks to PP hairloss)

hankg in there

*hugs*

PPD is really rough. You've got all the usual awfully scariness of depression, and the added burden of wondering how on earth your kid will thrive when you feel like it's such a struggle to do anything.

It does get better. This stage of parenting- well, it's is a huge adjustment for you, and an intrinsically torturous time in babycare (I mean that semi-literally- it actually helped me to remember that the CIA uses sleep deprivation to break people. That's how physiology works. It seems... evolutionarily suboptimal that babies wake you up so much, but there it is.).

I think that first three month window (or the 'fourth trimester') is harder than anything after that (even though they are a different kind of exhusting when they are mobile and tantruming). And the hormone crash is insane making independently of the sleep deprivation.

All in all, it's extremely hard. The more people that can help you out in any way the better. Getting a great therapist helped me out a lot. Talking to people did too, so if you don't blog try to reach out to people somewhere else to make up for it. Getting better takes a lot of work, at a time when everything takes too much out of you. But you can do this.

I'm so sorry to hear that you are having a tough time. I think it is normal to have some negative or anxious feelings plus feel tired but many people don't want to talk about it. Have you seen the TED talk about parenting taboos? http://www.ted.com/talks/rufus_griscom_alisa_volkman_let_s_talk_parenting_taboos.html I know several people who have liked their website because it has made them feel less alone.

I hope you are feeling better soon. Please take care of yourself.

I am sorry you are so down, it is quite unfortunate that the stupid hormones are making this already demanding time even harder for you.  Hang in there, get the help you need.  The sleep situation does get better, if ever so slowly (my 9 mo old is still up several times a night, but at least not every 2 hours any more - it has been a looong 9 months for us).  A day will come when you will wake up and see your life in colors again, and feel so much love for your little one that you will wonder how is it that you felt so differently just months ago; and you will hold on to your baby tight, wishing to slow time down so you can take it all in.  I hope this day comes to you soon!