Take this huge belly that I'm sporting: as cute as it is (and it really is cute), it's also becoming quite the laboratory hazard. It seems that, because of my shorter stature, the Little Monkey is just growing straight forward. The result? A belly that is continually running into equipment and knocking things over. Don't even get me started on how long it takes to pick something up when I drop it, and I do a lot of dropping while working at the bench. Of course, if I don't need it, then it remains on the floor; the poor janitor must love cleaning up the mess of toothpicks, tips, tubes, gloves, and kimwipes from around my bench by the end of the day. I'm starting to think I need one of these:

Figure 1. The Long Arm Grabber, available at your local hardware store

My newest challenge involves reaching the keyboard of my laptop, since the belly is preventing me from scooting my chair any closer to the desk. Leaning over isn't an option, since that squishes both the baby and belly. I can move the laptop closer to the edge of the desk, but I generally have notebooks/papers/data in front of the laptop. To try and resolve this issue, I spread my notebooks/papers/data onto the neighboring desk (which is vacant). But this seems to have created a new problem: I can't find anything. I've now printed out the same friggin' email containing much-needed information about an antibody I'm using three times, and I've lost all three copies. As much as I'd like to say screw it, I need a paper copy to have at my bench because, well, I can't remember a damn thing these days.

*Sigh*

At least I'm still willing and (mostly) able to do the research...I just need a little patience to grow alongside my already larger-than-life mid-section. Especially since the Monkey has another two months to grow, and I'm told he's about to enter into a growth spurt. WTF

Just don't be surprised if you read a story about a pregnant postdoc taking out a confocal microscope with her belly...I swear it's an accident waiting to happen.